Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Ooga Chukka

I have so many questions.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

New Flame Grilled Tacos

So... I almost burned down my apartment last night.

While attempting to reheat taco shells in the toaster oven, technology rebelled against me. I walked out of the room for one minute, one full minute, and smelled smoke. When I came back in there were flames a foot high.

I was able to reach behind the toaster oven to unplug it before I began throwing cups of tap water across the room. As I was quelling the flames of this beast, I couldn't help but picture what would happen if I couldn't put it out. In a flash, I saw myself standing outside of my burning building, shivering in my bathrobe as I explained to my irate shoeless neighbors and their scared pets that all I wanted was tacos.

Perhaps I should get on that new Taco Bell diet. Or just not touch appliances for awhile...

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Bad Days

When I'm feeling down and out and at the end of my rope, I try and channel strength from the usual sources. Food, music and movies. And from time to time, I gain insight and inspiration from a slew of fictional characters.

When I'm suffering workforce blues and feeling like the only girl in the boy's club, I like to channel Peggy Olsen, (Mad Men). She started at zero and fought her way, ever so politely to the corner office. She survived on sheer determination and subtle brute force.

Yet today I'm feeling the need to channel someone with a bit more strength and a layer of more class. Today, I'd really like to feel like I was walking as tall as Joan Holloway.

Whatever compromises she has made, it has always been done with herself in mind. She knows exactly who she is and has used all of the assets at her disposal. She's strong, sassy and unapologetic while somehow managing to stay the woman she is in the midst of the ultimate boy's club. Had I only the curves to match, I would enjoy ending this day feeling like I had done everything correctly without so much as a hint of regret.

I tip my bra to you, Joan. Wait, err....

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Cuss, That Was Good


With Christmas, a mere week behind me and my outrageous snacking habit still very much present, I sat down with a bag of Pepperidge Farm Cookies and proceeded to watch the highly anticipated film, Fantastic Mr. Fox.

It was if I dipped my heart into a bucket of happy and left it there to stew for 90 minutes. Sadly, I have no basis of comparison to the original story as I have not read the Roald Dahl novel. But if it was anything like Roald Dahl's imagination, Wes Anderson has sufficiently tapped into it.

Like many of Wes Anderson's films, animation only added to the overall look and feel that you usually get from them. He's ever consistent with his pans across the frame, revealing more and more scenery and stage-like space. It was like unfolding a pop-up story book. His characters were well rounded and reacted much like humans would. The artistry was absurdly astounding.

What you usually get from a children's story is a small lesson to be learned. Yet with the combination of Dahl's storytelling and Anderson's twists made this seem more of a modern day fable with lessons and themes that I would apply to my own life. Children should see this. Adults should see this. If I had a pet cat, I would make he/she see it.

At the end of the film I exclaimed, "I'm going to own this!" Future children and pets, be warned. You're getting a dose of furry animated creations that you wish you could live under your floor boards. (Because they're foxes...not because they're dead.)

Monday, January 4, 2010

Back From the Dead

Is it possible that I haven't blogged in two months? Oh, it's possible. This is simply unacceptable. What have my 5+ readers been doing with themselves? I'm sure you've all been sitting on your hands since my last post. You've been wondering what I've been doing with my time, how I've been spending my holidays, what sincere observations I've been making about the world.

It's really quite simple and I'd love to share with you what I've been doing with my time.


Eating.
I've just been eating. I went home for a few weeks and decided, "Why not eat every two hours?" It's quite simple. All you do is wake up, put off showering, let your drawstring pants a little, sit down at the table and have another slab of fried food. Then wait two hours, (or less) and keep going.

I recommend this for anyone who's simply tired of holiday conversations. Tired of answering that age old question: "How's work going?" Shove a cheesecake in your mouth. Don't know what to say in response to: "When are you going to get married and make babies?" See how many bacon wrapped figs you can ingest. Try it, it's fun!

For now, dear bloggers, I will commence regaling you with tales of the city, fierce opinions about worthless cinema and a few new snapshots taken with my camera from the future.

Welcome back. I've missed you.