Sexual Office Stretching: Uncalled For

After my long stint of no-blogging over the holidays, I return with half my energy today and report to you, simply this....

Office stretching. You have to do it. I understand this... A person of my meager physique who's rear end gets tired after two hours in the same sitting position, you just have to get up and take a lap. Touch your toes, crack your back, jog in place. All of these things are completely acceptable.

What's not acceptable to me, is sexual stretching. You know the kind I speak of. The kind where you lean back in your chair as far as possible, arms over your head and you let out an animal-like short grunt as you let your hands down. This happens more often than it should. It's completely unnecessary. In fact, the only time I would imagine this stretch is acceptable would probably be before the act of sex. Stretch it out. Get into it.

But office stretching, however...It's just not classy and makes me very uncomfortable. So if you could please pass this along to any other sexual stretchers you may know, you might save some embarrassment. In my face.